#or is it eating raw baking ingredients and asking for likes to eat one that could potentially kill me

[sansisnes]

You scare me but you're silly so you get a pass

HELP???

THANK YOU...? I THINK?

[fuckingrecipes]

Cooking question I'm too embarrassed to ask someone IRL: how easy or hard is it to accidentally poison yourself?

I know not to eat things that are too old (past the best-by date, changed color etc), I know not to eat things that were burned. I know to be careful about handling raw meat. I know how to store leftovers. I know to pay attention to instructions on the package and to check if the package is damaged etc.

But at the same time... well, a lot of cooking advice I've seen over the years includes some variation of "try things out, see what you like!" and I'd kind of like to do that. But if the results turn out inedible, I'd like them to be "inedible" as in "tastes very bad" and not "inedible" as in "going to upset your stomach" or "send you to the hospital"

If I try to cook/bake/roast/fry/whatever a food that can be eaten raw, like fruit, what are the odds that the result will be safe to eat?

What about lettuce? I'm aware it would probably taste bad, but would it be safe to try?

If I mix random liquid-y things from my pantry to make a sauce for whatever vegetables&meat I'm frying, what are the odds the result would be safe to eat? (Assuming all the components are edible by themself, I'm NOT talking about cleaning solutions or dish soap or whatever)

What might be some questions I don't even know I should check?

If I try to cook/bake/roast/fry/whatever a food that can be eaten raw, like fruit, what are the odds that the result will be safe to eat? If I mix random liquid-y things from my pantry to make a sauce for whatever vegetables&meat I'm frying, what are the odds the result would be safe to eat?

100% safe. There is a ZERO (0%) percent chance of accidentally creating a poison when cooking a safe-to-eat-raw food item.

You're not going to accidentally create a poison when you mix spices, sauces, or various edible ingredients together.

It's just not how chemistry works. With no exception I can think of, you can't take one safe-to-eat plant or animal and cook it or mix it with another in a way that will create a toxic substance.

Cooking lettuce to eat is safe. Cooking whole fruit is safe. Mixing a hundred sauces together is safe. Go for it.

I could take a sample of every single individually edible item in my fridge, pantry, and spice cabinet, blend it all into a big slurry, cook it & eat a portion of that concoction with confidence that I won't die from it. While it may be gross and taste bad, it won't actually harm me. It won't be a poison, no matter how many different types of food ingredients are tossed into the pot.

I cannot guarantee that you will never upset your stomach, because you could be sensitive to or allergic to an ingredient that I don't know about. It's not a poison to all humans, but it'd be uncomfortable to you. You can only learn about that through experience.

What CAN be dangerous:

Improper sterilization and improper technique can accidentally leave poison-producing bacteria or mold to breed when canning or fermenting foods.

Eating large amounts of a couple specific foods can be risky. There's not a lot of these, so here's a list of the big names to keep an eye on:

Cassia (common) cinnamon has a chemical that is toxic in larger quantities, but harmless in small quantities. If you eat 2 teaspoons a day, every day, you'll run into trouble. If you use Ceylon cinnamon instead, you can eat pretty much as much as you want.

Don't eat a whole nutmeg. It's wonderful when used sparingly, but can be poisonous in large amounts. Same rule as Cassia cinnamon: 2 teaspoons a day, every day, will get you into trouble. Eat less or less often.

Eating too much Liver (the organ) can cause copper toxicity and Vitamin A toxicity. It's great for you when added to a meal once a week, or a couple times a month, but shouldn't be eaten daily or in huge amounts.

Don't swallow cherry pits. They're generally harmless when swallowed whole, because they pass through digestion unscathed, but if they're crushed or cracked open first they release a compound that turns into cyanide when digested. Our body handles cyanide pretty well, but 4-5 cracked pits can become harmful. So: Don't chew them, and don't swallow them on purpose.

There are some foods which need special preparation to be made safe. They're safe COOKED, but not RAW.

Cooked beans & legumes are safe to eat. But if you're starting from a totally DRY bean or lentil (canned are pre-cooked) make sure to soak them in water for several hours and boil until they're FULLY COOKED before you eat. (Fully cooked is when you can crush them easily with a fork, with no gritty or hard center) Undercooked or uncooked beans & legumes can fuck up your guts real good. Very painful, horribly unpleasant, but probably won't kill you.

Cassava (the root vegetable that tapioca is made from) MUST be thoroughly cooked before eating. Raw cassava can be toxic. It's another cyanide bro.

Don't eat raw potatoes - always cook them. If your potatoes have sprouted, don't eat the sprouts & peel any green skin off. Tbh tho, an adult would need to eat at least a pound of green potatoes to get sick. Be reasonably cautious about it. Don't feed green potatoes to small children.

--

Note: This advice is intended for someone who shops at a grocery for their food, not someone who is foraging for ingredients or is growing their own. There's a lot more opportunities to poison yourself when working with whole plants in the wild, and not the prepared-for-sale ones at a store.

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

OMG SAW UR ASKS WERE OPEN AND I RAN SO FAST HFJDJSBS

Anyways ok so imagine *trips over my own feet* imagine uhm baking cookies *stumbling* baking cookies with Lilia:3

No pressure ofc! I hope u will enjoy writing this if u do! And make sure to drink after and take care of urself!

Flour Belongs In The Cookies; Lilia Vanrouge

Content; Gender-neutral reader, fluff, some pining

Word Count; 650+

Author's Note; Cloudy, you do know how bad his cooking is, right? Besides that, I hope you enjoy what I did with this little prompt!

As a reminder, do not put my work — or others for that matter — into AI as it steals. Link to Masterlist

You knew full well going into this that Lilia … wasn’t the best person to leave around food. Well, you didn’t know to the full extent how ‘bad’, ‘revolting’, and ‘utterly cursed’ he was according to his dormmates (and adoptive family? Still trying to wrap your head around that one, to be honest). 

Yet, as you were both adding ingredients to the batch of cookies you were making, he had done nothing to tamper with the recipe or mess up by accident. Perhaps Silver, Sebek and Malleus were just overexaggerating it? Lilia has been completely fine, a great helper even! 

“So,” you cleared your throat, breaking the quiet (which was both comfortable yet awkward). “Why did you want to bake cookies with me? Not that I mind, just curious is all.”

Lilia looked up from the wet and dry ingredients he was combining and offered you a cheeky smile with a wink. “Hmm, do I need a reason to do so,” he breathed with a silent chuckle, sneaking some of the raw dough into his mouth.

You tutted, taking the bowl away from him. “I don’t need you getting sick from eating that now–”

But your attempt at lecturing was silenced by a small puff of flour being slapped gently on your cheek; a white handprint now on it. “RUDE!”

Lilia was having a good old laugh, from either getting flour on you, the shocked expression on your face, or a combination of the two (knowing him, it was bound to be the last one). He was actually getting pink in the face because of it; was he even taking breaks from laughing to breathe???

“Ah, lighten up! Plus,” he paused and covered your hand in flour and gently slapped it on his cheek, “there, we match now.” 

His magenta eyes were twinkling with mischief and you found yourself gently shaking your head and chuckling. Sighing, you picked up some flour with your hands and made it look like you were just going to cover the countertop with it, but you swerved, and slapped it into Lilia’s hair.

Lilia coughed, and rubbed at his eyes, trying to get the flour out of his eyes, but once he opened them again, you were gone. So we’re playing games now? But he just wheezed in delight and gave chase, a cup full of flour on hand so he could repay the favour. After all, since you both had matching handprints on your cheeks, you deserved to be bestowed some flour on your head.

“And here you were saying it was rude of me for that first move,” he called out into the dorm. They couldn’t have gotten far now.

He heard the curtains ruffle, and he floated over, not making a sound.

Peaking oh so carefully behind the curtains, he spotted you, silently giggling to yourself. And that’s when he made his move.

“Found you!~” And he sprinkled the flour over your head; much more gently than you did to him.

You groaned, knowing it would take a bit to get the flour out from everything… but the way Lilia floated overhead made it look like he was sprinkling snow… was he always this pretty? Even with him covered in flour, you still felt your heart flutter.

You mentally slapped your cheeks though, and got yourself up. 

“Guess you did… but that was fun,” you chuckled, dusting yourself off to the best of your ability.

The moment though was ruined by your smoke alarm going off; it was a wonder that those even worked, but hey, at least they worked.

Rushing to the kitchen, you opened up the oven to have a mass of black smoke smelling of burnt food of some sort enveloping the both of you.

“What happened?!” You coughed out, trying to open up the windows and doors to let out the smoke.

Lilia grimaced, “Ah… perhaps I set the oven too high.”

And even though you had fun making the now coal-like cookies, perhaps store-bought would have been better…

...

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Tags; @afunkyfreshblog @eynnwwyjth @identity-theft-101 @ithseem @lucid-stories @ryker-writes @twistwonderlanddevotee @xxoomiii

[thezombieprostitute]

Old Recipes

A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.

Prompt: baking together but neither know what you're doing

A/N2: Reader is implied femme (use of "Doll"). No other physical descriptors used.

Warnings: None that I know of. Let me know if I missed any!

"Doll, I'll be honest, I'm fluent in about 7 languages, trained to read codes in those languages, and I still can't make heads or tails of this thing."

The "thing" in question was a handwritten recipe you'd found amongst your great-grandmother's things. While the family tore through her apartment to get what they wanted, you'd managed to snag her recipes collection. It was an amalgam of index cards, newspaper and magazine cutouts, and random pieces of paper with recipes written on them. You even found a napkin with a recipe on it!

Unfortunately, some of Grandma's handwritten recipes were less than legible. You'd been staring at this one in particular but the pieces weren't coming together, so you asked your boyfriend, Bucky to help out.

You take the recipe back from him. "Well we can agree to 2 eggs, 18 oz cake mix and a 1 lb can or canister of chocolate frosting."

"There's no baking instructions but raw egg doesn't seem like the kind of thing to eat. Even back in the 40's."

"I'm pretty sure that last bit says to cover with saran wrap and put it in the refrigerator."

"Maybe we're supposed to use the instructions on the cake mix box?"

"That would make sense," you nod. "But then, do we add 2 eggs on top of what the instructions say? And what the hell even is this line? It looks like it's saying 8 oz of kale!"

"Well, it's possible the eggs are meant to be like beaten egg whites?"

"But it says to beat them with the chocolate frosting."

"That is a good point."

"Wait," you squint your eyes in concentration. "Is that supposed to be 8 oz of cool whip? Look further down in the instructions."

"Okay, that's a possibility, but that line clearly says 'remove and cover with chocolate chips'. What are we removing it from? Is this recipe seriously asking us to bake frosting?"

"Well maybe that's the wrong ingredient," you mumble. You vow to beat this recipe some day.

Bucky kisses the top of your head, "please don't overwork yourself on this. Sometimes things just get lost to time." You pout at that, making him chuckle. "Right, I should know better than to try to dissuade you."

"Maybe F.R.I.D.A.Y. can help," you muse. "Can you get me an appointment with Tony?"

"For a recipe?" Bucky huffs in surprise.

"Make it a challenge! Tell Tony you bet even his best can't decipher a handwritten recipe!"

That makes Bucky laugh. "He'd definitely jump at the challenge, but I don't know that he'll be happy about putting so many resource behind a family recipe that was made maybe once or twice."

"But you'll ask him?" you pout with your best puppy dog eyes, knowing Bucky can't resist.

Bucky gently sighs as he gives you an eye roll. "Yes, I will ask."

"Thank you!" you chirp before covering him in kisses.

Tagging:

@alicedopey; @darsynia; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen;

@irishhappiness; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly; @stellar-solar-flare

Bonus: Here's the recipe I used as a reference!

[aguacatetoast]

Christmas Cookies

Female Reader x Monkey D. Luffy

A/N I don't really write fluff but I really hope you guys like it!!<3 Merry Christmas to those who celebrate:)

Warnings: None pure fluff!!

Word count:1,061

(Likes and reposts are greatly appreciated!<3)

You bake Christmas cookies with Luffy on christmas eve!

You rarely had the kitchen to yourself, but when you did you let the chef know in advance. Today was one of those days, Sanji had finished cleaning up after the Christmas feast and let you know the kitchen was free to use and wished you Goodluck. The reason being, that you were going to bake with Luffy.

You knew better than anyone just how gluttonous your boyfriend can be, but he always insisted on being by your side while you baked. His reasoning was that he liked to 'help' you, when in reality it was just you scolding him and swatting away his stretchy hands from eating all the raw cookie dough, and this time was no different. "Luffy!! Don't eat that, the raw ingredients can make you sick" you scolded him as his face was already covered with the flour and dough. His mouth was stuffed with the cookie dough as he spoke "But I'm hungryyyyy" he moaned as if he hadn't stuffed down a Christmas feast. You roll your eyes at him "Luffy you just ate like 30 pounds of meat and you're still hungry?" His stomach growled right after you asked that, he pouts slightly and pats his stomach "See? I wasn't lying."

You couldn't help but laugh at how cute he was begging for the cookie dough. He looks at you pouting and with pleading puppy eyes. "Okay fine... I'll give you some more cookie dough, but that's it because we need to leave some for Santa." His eyes lit up as you gave into his begging and immediately swallowed whole the sugar cookie dough you gave him. His cheeks stuffed like a chipmunk. You made more cookie dough, rolled it out, and started using Christmas cookie cutters to get the right shapes. Luffy was having a blast using his gum gum Gatling move to cut the cookies faster, the room was filled with his laughter.

After putting a batch of cookies to bake, Luffy is sitting by the oven admiring them and impatiently waiting for them to be ready. You hear him slightly groaning and muttering how the cookies are taking too long to bake. You ruffle his hair and smile "Be patient...they're almost done" He groans again "This is taking so long..." You come over with two mugs of hot cocoa and hand him one, "Here, to make the wait easier" He swipes the mug away from you and grins "Thanks! You're the best" He sips it slowly since it was piping hot, but that didn't stop him from trying to chug it.

After a few more sips of the hot cocoa, the timer indicating that the cookies are ready rings and he jumps up, "They're ready!!" You make your way to the oven and carefully place them on a cooling rack. "Careful babe, you'll burn yourself" but he was practically drooling over them. He ended up stealing one although you warned him, and he was trying to play it off "I-It's not that hot..." You saw how red his face was and smiled at how stubborn he is.

-

After the cookies cooled off, you had set a variation of decorations. Things such as various colors of icing, sprinkles, gummy, candies, and colored sugar. As you set your half of cookies on one side, you set his half on the other side. You called him "Babe the cookies are ready to decorate!" He rushes in and immediately grabs an icing bag. Noticing how eager he is you ask,"Oh how are you going to decorate your cookies?" He snickers and looks at you "It's a surprise...just wait and see." You were still extremely curious as you watched him gently squeeze and spread the frosting on the cookies, but you knew he wouldn't budge if you continued to ask, so you let him concentrate. You started playing some Christmas music as you decided to start decorating the cookies you'd leave out for Santa.

After an hour, you finally finished. You tried your damn hardest to make the cookies as precise and jolly as you could. You admired the decorations you made, the Christmas trees, the snowflakes, and the Santa hats. But you were so focused and in your zone you had forgotten about Luffy. You turned to look at him as he has a prideful grin on his face, and you saw the mess he made and the frosting all over his face, and he even had some in his hair. "Check it out! what do you think?" He moved away from hiding his cookies and let you see the surprise design he made. You felt an overwhelming sensation in your chest as you saw the surprise design he made was actually everyone in the crew.

You saw all the hard work he put into the cookies and admiring how adorable everyone came out, noticing sanjis extra curly eyebrow, and Zoro's face being grumpier then ever. You felt him looking at you for approval on how he did, when you turn to look at him "Luffy...these are the cutest cookies I've ever seen, you did amazing." His eyes lit up at your praise and he smiled, "Really you like em' that much?" You giggle softly as he pulls you closer by the waist "I love em', who knew you were such an artist." His laugh bubbles out loud when he pulls you even closer, "Let's leave our cookies and milk out for Santa..." You kiss him softly and admire that sweet excited expression he has all over his face, "Whatever you say Cap."

With that, you two set up a little table on the deck outside on a sunny, placing a mix of both of your cookies and a glass of milk. He smiles and looks at you while placing the cookies neatly before speaking up, "Wait... I wanted to eat this one" He points at the one he made of you. You felt your cheeks heat up a bit "You wanna eat me?" He nodded eagerly "Uh-huh! It's my favorite cookie out of all of 'em!" You couldn't say the cookie he made of you, "Of course babe...whatever you want." You saw as he devoured your cookie,

He wrapped one of his arms around you pulling you as close as possible to him and you hear him say "This was the best Christmas ever!"

-

[dreamyysouls]

bewitched

hitoshi shinsou x gn!reader

synopsis: hitoshi as your boyfriend.

cw: purely a drabble, headcanons, no caps, kinda long, fluff

hitoshi has never loved anyone as much as he loves you, and he makes sure to show it.

he is an absolute sweetie pie.

he buys things for you constantly, whether it’s a drink from a vending machine or a pretty necklace you pointed out while shopping together.

“this was so expensive, hitoshi! you didn’t have to.”

“i just thought you would appreciate it.”

hitoshi LIVES for cuddles and physical touch with you.

things like holding your hand, his arms lingering around you while he hugs you send a warm feeling straight to his heart.

his hugs are tight, but in a good way.

once he pulls you in, you aren’t escaping until he lets go.

“toshi, we’ve been sitting here for three minutes…”

“don’t act like you don’t like it.”

loves kisses. quick ones, long ones, steamy ones. it doesn’t matter what kind.

he whines when you pull away before he wanted to finish.

“no, come back, love…i wasn’t done yet..”

you give in every time, but how could you say no? 

hitoshi will dote over you for the smallest things.

a cat scratches you? he’s ready with bandaids and anti-infection cream.

if you ever are seriously injured, he would be right at your side making sure you had everything you needed.

same thing goes for when you’re sick — he’s not a nurse, but will most definitely turn into one for you.

he would drop everything for you in a heartbeat.

you would have to force him to go to at least one class. even that was a difficult task.

“i care too much to leave you here alone.”

hitoshi notices the little things about you.

the little twinkle your eyes get while teasing, the way your eyebrows furrow as you figure out a math problem, the slump in your shoulders after a long day. he sees it all.

he doesn’t just know your mannerisms, he knows you.

he definitely has a little folder on his phone so he remember all of the things you like

the color of jewelry you wear? in the folder. your favorite sanrio character? in the folder.

he cares for you so much, and shows it in all the ways he knows how to.

hitoshi loves spending time with you.

he makes an effort to take you out when you’re both free, considering your busy schedules.

there is a cat cafe you both frequent. the cats there are the sweetest and are always eager to see the two of you walk through the doors.

whenever he can get the money to, he will take you out for a nice dinner. not to mention, it gives him an excuse to put on that fancy top that you like.

he loves aquarium dates. he enjoys how you two could admire the animals in silence, his hand wrapped around your body as he holds you close.

hitoshi also loves the simple hangouts you share.

he will rot with you when you both just need a recharge. you’ll snuggle in his arms, your favorite tv show playing on your laptop as his fingers rub circles on your arm.

okay but…he loves dress to impress.

saw you playing it one day and asked to try…he’s been addicted since.

definitely will buy you (and himself) vip if you don’t have it already.

(i could go on about this all day)

his outfits eat i fear..

“how did that win??! this game is rigged.”

you guys cook and bake together late at night

he will place flour on your nose while you’re mixing ingredients, then say he needed somewhere to wipe his hand off.

“we have napkins for a reason.”

“your face was appealing to me.”

you both eat so much raw cookie dough it’s concerning.

hitoshi reminds you how beautiful you are. every day.

without fail, he will find some way to point out your beauty.

sometimes it’s blatant, and others it’s subtle.

he’ll compliment how your hair looks, how pretty your smile is, or simply stare at you for a little longer than normal.

he calls you beautiful as a pet name. you can’t tell me he wouldn’t.

“have i told you how gorgeous you look in that top?”

“many times, toshi. thank you.”

he admires your inner beauty and the way your kindness still shines through in the dark.

he may not mention it, but he loves the way that you love him.

he feels seen by you, in a way he has never felt in his life. you are his rock, just as he is yours.

hitoshi shinsou is completely head over heels for you in every way possible.

a/n: hey guys!! i am a thought daughter and this is a result of that. i love this man very much, and so do the other 8 shinsou fans 🙏🙏 as always hope you enjoyed and if you did please leave a like and reblog!! my requests are open if you would like me to write something :)) get lots of sleep and drink lots of water!! love ya!!

[kcrossvine-art]

Heya folks! Its been a bit, food insecurity is a bitch, but today on the quest of cooking our way through Lord of the Rings we're gonna be making a dish exclusively mentioned in the 2007 MMO-

We will be making a Rohan Pasty! 

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes into a Rohans Pasty?” YOU MIGHT ASKBasics. Meat n potatoes of your meat-in-dough food. .

All-purpose flour

Salt

Baking powder

Vegetable oil

Olive oil

Ground beef

Garlic salt

Ground cumin

Chili powder

Dried oregano

Waxy potato

Garlic

White onion

Egg

"A delicious local pastry filled with beef and potatoes."- LOTRO Rohan is a kingdom of humans in middle-earth, and the description point towards a cornish pasty (yes, pasty not pastry). Oddly enough the image is more of an empanada but you win some you lose some. This heritage informs much of the shape and ingredients of this dish, however we're opting to cook most of the ingredients before adding them in, contrary to going in raw as a cornish pasty calls for. I chose to deviate here because cooking beforehand allows more seasoning to be crammed in. The english hate seasoning.

AND, “what does a Rohans Pasty taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

Tastes like the best pot pie youve had, less soggy

Excellent for an after-rugby/martial arts/soccer dinner

The potatoes are foundational

Despite needing the least work

Pasta salad (cucumber, olives, pepperocini) would pair well as a side

And would also pair well with beer

This meal bears the gold star sticker of not having any major issues! Hooray! Maybe its increased comfortability in the kitchen, or maybe its because of how very simple this one is. Chopped roasted bell pepper might be good in the filling in the future.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Get the dough ready ahead of time- its mentioned in the recipe below but i also wanted to say a foreword here that it needs to sit in the fridge for a few hours. Just so ya dont get everything out and realise itd take too long for dinner tonight. Speaking of dough, i feel like it could have more flavor added to it. Its bland and although its not part of the tradition of the meal its based off of, cornish meat pasty, it might be nice to add some spices like cumin or black pepper to the flour. 

The meal reheats perfect- wrap in papertowl and put it in the microwave for 30 seconds per pasty.

When picking your potatoes make sure theyre "new" potatoes (baby ones) or whichever potato with the least amount of starch you can get. Its important for it to cook inside the pasty that it not have too much lest it get Mushy Bad.

Another thing about its real-life inspo; Cornish pastys were workers food, stuff you could carry into the mines, stuff thatd reheat well. You could hold the crust with your dirty hands and throw it away once you ate the rest. I always feel partial to these foods. Although I'd still eat the dirty crust.

This recipe earns a solid 8/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) 

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Dough Ingredients:

370g all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon baking powder

74g vegetable oil

240g warm water

Filling Ingredients:

2 tablespoons(ish) olive oil

1 pound ground beef

2 tablespoons tomato paste

Garlic salt to taste

Ground cumin to taste

Chili powder to taste

Dried oregano to taste

5 cloves garlic, minced

1 white onion, diced

Method:

Combine flour, salt and baking powder.

Add oil and water into mixer with dough hook running at medium speed. Mix for 1 minute, stopping several times to scrape the sides of the bowl.

When mixture comes together and begins to form a ball, decrease mixing speed to low. Continue to mix just until dough is smooth.

Take the dough ball, safely wrap it, and transfer to fridge. Let sit for at minimum 2 hours.

For the meat, get a large skillet, and add some olive oil over medium heat. Add the ground beef and garlic salt, cook until the beef is cooked completely.

Drain the beef and set aside.

In the same pan, add the garlic, onions, cumin, chili powder, oregano, and salt.

Cook until the onions are softened but not brown, 10 to 15 minutes. Re-add the beef and cook over low heat for about 5 more minutes.

Back to the dough, transfer dough from fridge to well-floured work surface. Roll into log and divide into 10 equal portions. 

Preheat oven to 350f.

Form each piece into a ball and flatten each with a rolling pin.

Add a layer of diced potatos down the middle of the pastys. Add the meat filling to each. Fold the sides of the dough up to seal on top in the middle.

Gently turn the pasty on its side and crimp the edge, alternating a braid pattern. Use knife to cut an "X" shaped slit in the top. Repeat for each pasty.

Place the pastys on a greased baking sheet. Lightly coat each pasty with an eggwash using a basting brush.

Cook for about 50 minutes, or until golden brown, and let cool!

[makingyoufeels1ck]

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas — S.R.

This is a secret santa present for my friend :) I’ve never written x reader before so bear with me

Summary: Spencer helps you bake Christmas cookies

fluff, no warnings, wc: 714

December 22, 2005

You’d been seeing Spencer for just shy of six months. You were finally getting to meet the BAU team at Rossi’s Christmas party the next evening, and you had promised you would bring a platter of cookies. Red velvet cookies, which happened to be a specialty of yours. Spencer had insisted on coming over and helping (although he was a nightmare in the kitchen). You were pretty sure it was only because he missed you after a particularly draining case.

He leaned against the counter while watching you crack eggs into the bowl. “Are you going to wash your hands when you’re done?” he asked, fidgeting with his hands nervously. You smiled, almost as if you knew he’d ask that (you did, because of course he asked).

“Yeah, baby, why wouldn’t I?”

“Well, when you touch the egg shells, they carry salmonella bacteria, you know–”

“Spence,” you said, turning your head to him. “I will wash my hands. Full 20 seconds, okay?” you went to the sink and washed your hands. He looked at you, although you were sure it wasn’t because he was making sure you were washing your hands correctly. You were giggling the whole entire time, and he looked at you with a pink blush dusted across his cheeks. You dried your hands off and looked back at him. “What, pretty boy?”

“Uhm…You just look really beautiful right now,” he said, voice getting high pitched and squeaky like it did when you made him flustered. You leaned over and kissed his cheek, which only made him blush more.

“I’m covered in flour, my hair’s a mess, and you think I look beautiful right now?” you asked. You moved your hand up and pushed some of his hair out of his face. He got so cute when he was flustered, looking at you with his sweet brown puppy eyes.

“Well, I always think you look really beautiful,” he said as if it was the most common known fact in the world. It was your turn to blush. You leaned in and kissed him, slowly, sweetly, like honey dripping into a cozy cup of tea. He held your face and kissed you back. He’d always kissed you like he was hungry for it, like it was the very thing he needed to keep going.

“I need to finish the cookies,” you whispered, just barely pulling away before he pulled you back in for another kiss. You smiled and kissed him back before going back to your bowl of half made cookie dough. You finished mixing in the wet ingredients then added the dry ones.

“Do you want some cookie dough?” you asked him, taking a small chunk of the red dough and taking a bite.

“Don’t eat that!” Spencer said, almost shrieking. His face was scrunched up like you just kicked a puppy. “You’re going to get sick–”

“It’s just cookie dough, Spence.”

“Raw cookie dough! With raw eggs! And the flour wasn’t cooked beforehand. You know that can get you sick, right? The bacteria in it…” He proceeded to go on a whole lecture about the consequences of eating raw cookie dough. You listened, of course, because you always listened to him. You covered the dough in saran wrap and put it to chill in the fridge. He was still talking as you closed the refrigerator door and went over to him. You wrapped your arms around him and kissed his cheek, which finally made him go quiet. He looked down at you.

“What was that for?” he asked quietly.

“Making sure I don’t get sick,” you said. “And because it makes you blush.” You laughed as you watched his cheeks redden a bit more, burying your face against his neck.

“This isn’t funny,” Spencer said, but he was smiling. You were still laughing as he pulled you closer, his hands resting on your lower back.

“Thank you for helping me with the cookies,” you whispered against his neck.

“But I didn’t really help,” Spencer said. “I kind of just sat there while you did all the work. I don’t think that counts.”

“You gave me a really great view.” You moved your hand down and squeezed his ass a little bit, making him yelp and go bright red.

[consolecadet]

Tips for freshly diagnosed celiac-havers

Someone I knew asked me for advice after getting diagnosed with celiac. I gave her some. I might as well share them with you as well!

I am not a doctor, and not your doctor, I'm just some guy with celiac disease. Ask an actual doctor for help with medical decisions. I'm in the northeastern United States, so you might have to go hunting for equivalent resources if you live elsewhere.

Are you done with testing?

If you had a tTG-IgA blood test with an elevated result, or a doctor just told you you have celiac, but you have not gotten a biopsy via endoscopy to confirm your diagnosis, WAIT! You may not want to stop eating gluten quite yet. You have to be eating gluten for the biopsy test to work.

It is not fun to stop eating gluten, start feeling better, and then have to start eating it again just to prove that you really have celiac disease.

Your choice in this area is personal. If you know you're going to have to wait years to get an endoscopy, it would probably be healthier and more pleasant to stop eating gluten now and then do a "gluten challenge" for a few weeks before your endoscopy.

If it's unlikely you will ever get an endoscopy (too expensive, inaccessible, phobia, etc), there's no point in waiting for something that may never come -- just stop eating gluten now.

But if you can schedule an endoscopy for a month or two from now, it's probably best to keep eating gluten until the endoscopy. Sorry.

Please eat food. Like, enough food.

The most important tip I got early in my diagnosis is that if you stop eating gluten and you start feeling crummy -- dizzy, cranky, tired, etc -- it's not because you're going through "gluten detox" or some shit. It's because you're hungry!

It's easy to accidentally start eating way less when you start eating gluten free. A celiac diagnosis can make you want to avoid eating because food feels scary and stressful. Cutting a major ingredient from your diet without knowing what to replace it with can also leave you undernourished.

You really need nourishment when you are recovering from celiac! Your body need energy from food to use on healing your intestines. If you've lived with celiac for a long time, you probably have vitamin deficiencies you're trying to bounce back from. The emotional difficulty of adjusting to a new diagnosis is also much easier to face if you're not starving.

All of this advice applies equally regardless of body size. Yes, even if you are very fat. If you're hungry, eat.

Where to find information about gluten-free food

The gold standard for basic celiac info is celiac nonprofits. There's a ton of info about celiac disease and the gluten free diet on their websites. I recommend:

Celiac Disease Foundation

Beyond Celiac

You know what's not a legitimate celiac nonprofit? Gluten Free Society. Do not listen to anything GFS or its founder Peter Osborne have to say. Osborne is not an actual doctor, nor is he doing actual nutrition science. He is a chiropractor (i.e. quack) so bad that his state's board of chiropractors threatened to revoke his license. Don't let anyone tell you celiac means you can't have corn!!! Truly, wtf @ this guy.

Google's AI summaries for searches like "Is XYZ food gluten free" are often inaccurate (because they pick up sites like GFS). I always click through to the source to be sure. "Is XYZ food celiac safe" sometimes gives more useful search results.

I also like this presentation "I Have Celiac" for a super in-depth guide to having and living with celiac. The OP made it to show to loved ones to explain their deal, but it's so thorough that I found it helpful for myself when I got my diagnosis.

I want to buy food that's safe for celiac...how do I do that?

You should be able to find gf food at any supermarket. The selection of baked goods and processed foods may be lacking, depending on where you live, but produce, raw unmarinated cuts of meat, and other whole foods like milk and eggs are generally safe even if not labeled gf.

A lot of supermarkets have an indicator on the price labels to help you -- for example, at Stop and Shop, the labels on the shelf have an orange circle that says "gf" in it under foods that are gluten free. It's best to check the packaging too, since Stop and Shop sometimes gets it wrong!

Something that says "gluten free" or "certified gluten free" on it is safe for celiac*. Something that doesn't say "gluten free" on the packaging may also be safe, so long as it also doesn't contain wheat, barley, or rye, or have a wheat allergy warning under the ingredient list. Here are some tips for what to look for on ingredient labels.

Labels can get real complicated real fast, so just use your best judgment. It's okay if you don't get it right 100% of the time. The goal when living with celiac is to reduce gluten exposure as much as possible, not to hermetically seal yourself in a deep well where a single molecule of gluten can never possibly reach your tongue. You, and only you, get to decide how much exposure risk you're comfortable with.

My favorite grocery store post-diagnosis is Wegmans. My nearest one is a bit of a hike, so I don't go that often, but it's such a treat when I do. Wegmans has a huge gluten free aisle with gf staples and fun snacks, plus lots of food items that can be harder to find gf, like fresh pasta and baked goods.

I also like the online health food store iHerb for finding new gf snacks and ingredients. You can filter the whole store by dietary needs, so you can also find gf skincare/makeup items and supplements if you want. I have a discount link for 20% off: https://secure.iherb.com/rewards/rewards-program?rcode=DRO2876

The best way to find restaurants that can accommodate celiac is Find Me Gluten Free. It's essentially a gluten-free Yelp. People use the site/app to review of restaurants for 1) what cross-contact precautions the restaurant takes and 2) crucially, if the food was good!

Gf food can be expensive, ngl. The National Celiac Association has advice for how to save money on gf food, including a database of food pantries that set aside gf food for people who need it.

GF ~influencers~

If you want to follow some people who Get It, I like:

Phil Hates Gluten (on IG, TT, and YT) has EoE (another gluten-related autoimmune condition). He reviews gf food and restaurants and makes silly videos about the gf experience.

Robyn's Gluten-free Living on YouTube has gf baking videos and advice about traveling, eating at restaurants, saving money on gf food, and more.

Here on Tumblr, @gluttonysansgluten and @certifiedceliac (and I would love more recommendations for celiac related Tumblr accounts!)

Having celiac is really hard. But it does get easier.

I felt overwhelmed and honestly kind of doomed when I got my celiac diagnosis. For the first few months I felt like I couldn't trust any food and I was going to be totally excluded at all social events forever. It sucked. But then I got a lot of practice figuring out which foods were safe for me, advocating for myself at restaurants and when my friends were planning get-togethers involving food, and now things are really not that bad. And I feel way, way less sick.

If you feel overwhelmed or don't know how to interpret the 1 million sources online telling you what's gluten free, I really recommend seeing a dietician. Your best bet is a weight-neutral or HAES dietician who mentions celiac somewhere on their website or online profile. You can generally count on those folks to give you practical information about how to live with celiac, as well as emotional support as you adjust to what is probably a pretty big and stressful change in your life and how you view yourself!

You got this!

*Please do not talk about Cheerios on my post. Make your own.

[steviewashere]

Better Together

Rating: General CW: None for this one! Tags: Post-Canon, Fluff, Comfort No Hurt, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Established Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Baking, Steve Harrington Likes to Bake, Food as a Metaphor for Love, Sharing Food, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Soft Steve Harrington, Soft Eddie Munson

For @steddie-week | July 7th Prompt: Free Space | WC: 870

Hehe, I want to say that I chose the word "heart" as my inspiration, but I saw a recipe for heart shaped thumbprint cookies on Pinterest and this is what came to mind <3

Title from "Better Together" by Jack Johnson

🍪—————🍪 Steve makes thumbprint cookies for every holiday he can think to. Halloween gets some with black currant jam, Independence Day gets blueberry, Christmas has cranberry, orange marmalade for Thanksgiving. So on and so forth. He learned to bake because of his nana, may she rest, and he wants to continue to share her love with the world.

So, he expands from holidays. He makes them for first days of school. When a neighbor of his breaks their leg. Bakes them for a little girl around the block, tells her she can sell them with her lemonade—he even buys a little paper cup; it’s not the greatest lemonade, too much water, but he still smacks his lips and says it’s the best cup in the world. He bakes them for Robin when she can’t sleep from nightmares; for the party when it comes to D&D campaigns; for himself when it’s the middle of the night and he misses what home used to be like—loud and full and warm.

And he makes them, too, when he starts dating Eddie sometime after Vecna. Eddie’s had some cookies; been there in the kitchen, the dining room, outside even. Been there to see if they’re “poisoned.” Shown up, without notice, holding a jar of homemade raspberry jelly from his kitchen, claiming it to be his mama’s recipe.

Over time, he realizes he wants to share this recipe of his with Eddie, too. Though, Eddie’s kind of a mess in the kitchen—he’s not a terrible cook, not at all, but he’s very…all over the place. Sometimes dishes will sit for too long in the sink, or he won’t set a timer within the first two minutes, or he’ll accidentally chop too much of an herb. He gets distracted and it’s honestly endearing, but Steve doesn’t trust him to bake, not completely.

While he’s making cookies for them for Valentine’s Day, the idea smacks him right in the face. He’s got the dough all rolled into balls, placed on sprayed parchment paper, oven preheated. Ready to go.

He wipes his hands on a nearby dish rag. Calls from the kitchen, “Eddie?” And he’s there beside Steve within the blink of an eye; his eyes darting between the tray of cookies and Steve himself, probably two seconds away from attempting to eat raw cookie dough—again. “Wanna help me with something?” Steve asks finally.

“Uh, sure, Stevie. You need me to grab an ingredient from the pantry? Make sure no flies get on the dough?”

Steve shakes his head. Knows that if he leaves him alone with the tray, the cookies won’t even have the chance to be baked. So, he looks on and smiles at Eddie fondly for: being so thoughtful and also because there’s a stray strand of hair curling from his hairline. His hair is up and out of his face, there are indents around his eyes from wearing his magnifying goggles, little splotches of mini-figure paint on his fingers. It’s sweet. Domestic, if he stops to think about it.

He leans into that. Swipes away that strand of hair. Scoops up Eddie’s hands. The warmth and weight welcoming in his own palms.

“Wash up with me and then help me thumbprint the cookies?”

Instead of words, Eddie drifts over to the sink. They wash their hands one after the other. Eddie scrubs furiously at his skin, making sure that every last little flake of paint swirls down the drain, and then he sidles up to Steve. Looks cowed at the still raw dough.

“M’kay,” Steve murmurs, “so for Valentine’s Day, I do things a little different.” He grabs Eddie’s left hand, from where it’s resting limp on the countertop, and hovers it over the baking sheet. Then, he takes his right hand and does the same, just underneath Eddie’s. Presses that thumb into the top of one cookie. “You see how my thumbprint is sort of sideways?”

“Mhm,” Eddie hums. “Yeah, I see that.” Steve quickly glances up, another surge of fondness working through him. Eddie’s face is one of pure concentration: eyebrows furrowed, eyes squinted, tongue poking from between his lips. 

Steve makes himself look back at the cookies before he does something stupid like propose.

He carefully lowers Eddie’s hand until he can press his thumb on the other side of the cookie. When he draws the hand away, he comments, “There. Now, our thumbs are making a heart on the cookie.” Tilts the baking pan a little so that it’s angled towards Eddie. “See? I do that to all of my Valentine’s Day cookies. Except, now I have somebody to do it with.”

Eddie looks up to him. Eyes crinkled in the corners and a soft, adoring smile on his face. “You do your half and then I’ll chase after?”

He smiles back, teeth and all. “I’d love that, Eds. Then, when we’re done, you can pick the jam we use.”

At the end of the day, Steve made two dozen thumbprint cookies. Each of them filled with Eddie’s homemade raspberry jam. Most importantly, though, each of them are—

“Shaped with our love,” Eddie points out.

And that sounds like the sweetest treat of them all.

🍪—————🍪

[visitmycoffin]

ADAM REQUEST. i've been thinking about what it would be like to spend holiday's with him. could you write about that ? like watching christmas movies , baking food , eating halloween treats together. stuff like that :)

Adam Stanheight — Holiday Headcannons

(Please don't steal my writing! Takes place before the bathroom trap. Reblogs and likes are encouraged ♡)

Warnings: romantic gestures - gore mention - cursing - Slight vomit mention - slight NSFW mention - Alcohol mention

SFW, GN romantic headcannons

HALLOWEEN

• Has always preferred Halloween over any holiday. Enjoys the scares and the stupid horror movies with the main characters that seem to have an IQ less than 10.

• Drags you to every thrift store in town to try and find anything Halloween related. A shirt with Ghostface on it? Bought. A tiny chain that says 'Childs Play?' Bought. A hat, one he knows he'll never wear, that has Micheal Myers with a knife? Bought. And he only acts like this in October.

• Likes snuggling up under the blankets with you just so you guys can watch horror movies, no matter how bad or good. He commentates on the stupidity of the characters in the movie you guys chose.

• Favorite horror villain is Michael Myers. He gets angry when people say that he's 'overrated.'

• Definitely perfers slasher films over others. Can't really do gore. Those movies make him pretty ill to the stomach. Just doesn't like seeing someone get sawed in half while their intestines fall out.

• Tries his best to decorate the apartment for Halloween, but can't do much since money is tight. He perfers when you make different cut out banners to hang on the walls or shit like that.

• Makes obnoxious comments during the movies you guys watch. Can't keep his mouth shut for a moment.

• At least once he'll have a nightmare during the month and then literally won't sleep for the rest of the night like a child. He gets angry when you try to comfort him, claiming that he 'doesn't need that bullshit.'

• On Halloween night, you two obviously dress up. He takes photoshoots of you guys in your outfits, you two are always matching, and then hangs them up in his darkroom every year. That night, you two eat a ton of Halloween candy, meaning one of you two end up vomiting from the amout of sugar you consumed.

CHRISTMAS

• Depsite trying his hardest, will never ever be able to bake Christmas cookies without your help. They'll always end up being some sort of burnt, black blob or so undercooked you can taste each raw ingredient.

• Favorite Christmas movie is The Santa Clause.

• Absolutely despises the cold. Yet, if you beg hard enough, he will go out in the snow with you and throw snowballs. After a snowball fight, he likes to tackle you to the ground and kiss you all over in a way to warm you up.

• Really likes hot chocolate. Will do anything you ask as long as he gets a mug full of hot chocolate after.

• Goes to the mall with you, if money isn't tight, and buys you two ugly Christmas sweaters to wear on Christmas morning.

• Not too good at gift giving. Maybe he'll throw some perfume / cologne into a box along with a cute little glass trinket of your favorite animal. Something small and stupid that means a lot.

• All he wants for Christmas is a box of cigarettes ♡

• Will watch Christmas movies with you, but probably won't pay much attention. As figured, he'd probably talk through the whole thing.

• Christmas morning, he wakes up around 9-10 A.M. and opens the gifts you two got each other. There's not a lot, but it's still special to him, even if he's not the gift kind of guy.

• If having a bad day, he'd perfer to stay inside with you. Maybe have a nice, hot bath with you with a little Christmas bath bomb. Something corny like that.

• After building gingerbread houses with you, he will slam his fist into his in order to break it so he can just lick the icing off of the gingerbread pieces.

EASTER

• Used to be utterly terrified of the Easter bunny when he wa younger.

• He honestly doesn't do much for this holiday other than hide little plastic eggs around the apartment for you to find.

(Sorry for the shortness of this one 😭)

VALENTINES DAY

• Showers you with affection all day.

• When you wake up in the morning, he's not in bed. A note lies on the bedside table that reads, 'Went out to get some groceries for us today. Your coffee is already made for you.' The note makes you aware that he will be the most loving guy he can be all day today.

• Leaves kisses all over your cheeks, neck, collarbone, etc. All day.

• Asks to shower alongside you. Nothing happens behind the shower curtain besides soft kisses and hugs as you two wash each other's bodies and hair.

• At around dinnertime, you guys sit in his living room, talking and cuddling while watching some dumb romance movie. He hands you a small book. Inside lies a bunch of photo collages between you two, thus being your Valentines gift.

• Takes you out to your favorite bar after dinner and gets you two drunk off your favorite alcohol.

• Once home, he brings you to bed, lathering you in kisses and soft love bites.

• (NSFW) Asks you if you two can have sex that night. If so, he makes sure it's all slow and sensual, unless suggested otherwise. Still, marking you as his with tiny kisses and hickies.

• Aftercare includes him holding your head against his chest and whispering how much he is in love with you. Gently plays with your hair, peppering kisses over your jaw and lips.

———

Hope this was good! Sorry for it not being too long. My first ever headcannon / fic on tumblr so I hope I did well. More requests would be appreciated. Ty for reading ♡

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

Galileo Galilei Birthday Story

Translations may not always capture the exact nuances or tone of the original text. Expect grammatical errors and inaccuracies.

Not proofread. Rush translation.

Mitsuki: "So, Galileo."

Mitsuki: "Do you have a favorite food? It could be a dish or an ingredient."

Galileo paused from eating and turned toward me with a slightly puzzled expression.

Galileo: "Why are you suddenly asking me that?"

Mitsuki: "Well, your birthday is coming up, right? I thought I'd make something you really enjoy."

Galileo: "Birthday."

Galileo: "I see, from this year on, you'll be here with me."

Mitsuki: "Yep."

It will be the first birthday we spend together since our feelings became mutual.

That's why I'm eager to make it special.

Mitsuki: "Actually, I wanted to surprise you by making something, but then I realized I still don't know much about you."

Galileo: ".........."

Even though my feelings for him kept getting stronger, I still didn't know much about him.

As I lowered my gaze in frustration, a cool hand touched my cheek.

Galileo: "Don't make that face. From now on, we'll get to know each other little by little."

(Little by little, huh? He's right.)

Even that gentle smile of his was something I couldn't have seen not too long ago.

Mitsuki: "Okay, thanks."

Returning his smile, he nodded and neatly placed his cutlery on the plate.

Galileo: "Oh, right. For my birthday, could you prepare schiacciata with grapes?"

Mitsuki: "Schiacciata?"

Galileo: "Yeah. In some regions, it's also called focaccia."

Mitsuki: "Ah, I know focaccia, but I've never had one made with grapes."

Galileo: "It's a traditional pastry from my hometown. You won't really find it around here."

Mitsuki: "I see. That makes sense."

(Wait, but how am I supposed to make it?)

(Maybe I should check the bookstore or the library.)

Then, as if sensing my little dilemma, Galileo spoke up.

Galileo: "Don't worry. There should be a recipe in the local history book in my room."

Mitsuki: "That's great! Thank you."

I sighed in relief at his words.

Galileo: "To put it simply, it's made by layering dough with grapes and baking it."

Galileo: "However, you should use grapes meant for winemaking, not the kind for eating raw."

Galileo: "My hometown is known for its grape cultivation. My family often made it."

Mitsuki: "So, it's a taste filled with memories of your family."

Galileo: "Yeah."

(I'm so happy that he requested a dessert with such sentimental value.)

I learned one more thing about him.

Mitsuki: "Got it."

Mitsuki: "I'll start practicing tomorrow, and on the day of your birthday, I'll treat you to a delicious schiacciata!"

Galileo: "I'm looking forward to it."

(If I'm going to do this, I want to be particular about the grapes. But fresh grapes for winemaking might not be available at the market. Oh, I know!)

I made a suggestion as an idea struck me.

And so, the day of his birthday arrived.

Mitsuki: "Wow, the air smells nice!"

We'd escaped the bustle of Paris and traveled to a vineyard in the countryside.

Galileo: "The grapes are in good condition. It looks like this year's harvest will be a good one."

Vineyard Owner: "Yes. The weather's been kind to us this year, and I'm confident it'll be a remarkable vintage."

This little trip was the very suggestion I'd made to him that evening.

He agreed and even rescheduled his university lectures.

(I'm so glad I was bold enough to invite him. Galileo looks like he's enjoying himself.)

On top of that, we were able to get fresh grapes, and I got to spend the entire day with him.

Galileo: "The vineyard on the other side of the river looks like it has lower hedges."

Vineyard Owner: "That's because they're a different variety. The soil on the other side of the river is completely different from here."

The friendly vineyard owner led the way, explaining as we followed him through the fields.

Vineyard Owner: "But even with the same climate, the grapes here achieve a perfect balance of sweetness and acidity, just like on the other side."

Galileo: "The soil, huh?"

Suddenly, he stopped walking and crouched, running his hand through the soil to feel its texture.

Galileo: "This side seems to be a clay-rich soil, retaining just the right amount of moisture."

Vineyard owner: "Yes, thanks to that, the wine we make here has a smoother, fruitier flavor and is easier to drink."

Galileo: "I see."

He stood up again, gazing back across the river.

Galileo: "Judging by the terrain, the other side is probably gravelly soil. If that characteristic is a product of the soil's water retention ability, then the wines produced on the well-drained opposite bank would likely be rich and deep-flavored."

Vineyard Owner: "----!"

Galileo: "You're utilizing the unique characteristics of each soil type in your cultivation."

(Wow. He can even predict how the wine will taste just by looking at the soil.)

Vineyard owner: "I'm impressed! You've got quite an eye, sir. I'd hire you at our château if you ever wanted a job."

Galileo: "I'll pass, but I'll gladly take some wine as a souvenir."

Watching him enjoying himself made me smile.

Vineyard Owner: "Take your time and enjoy yourselves!"

Mitsuki: "Thank you."

We parted ways with the owner after he taught us how to choose the best grapes.

Mitsuki: "Shall we start picking?"

Galileo: "Yeah."

(I want to choose the very best-looking grapes from this vineyard.)

(The ones that are deep in color, uniform, and plump.)

As I walked, carefully examining each bunch of grapes一

Galileo: "Mitsuki."

He suddenly called my name and pulled me close, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

Part 1 ╎ Part 2 ╎ Premium ╎ Epilogue

[ravennaortiz]

Congratulations!!! I love this so much! You know me and my Juicy baby!

Juicy and Coffee

Teaching Juicy Boy to bake cookies! I see a lot of cuteness!!!!

Thank you!!!! Girllllll do I know about you and Juice! Teaching him how to bake cookies?!?!?! Love it!

Juice in my head can cook but baking? Its not his thing, he just cant get his head around it.

So when he meets you he feels like he is in heaven with all the baked good you make for him and the guys.

When he asks you to teach him he's all nervous laughs and movements until you say yes.

He's like a little kid and wants to make every cookie ever made and pouts a bit when you suggest starting with one for now lol

When you arrive at his house with the ingredients he has Christmas music playing and is holding matching aprons for you guys to wear!

He is a serious student! Taking notes and following your every direction. Though he does get distracted because you are so beautiful and he cant help but give kisses and have his hands on you. Leaving you with flour hand prints....everywhere even under the apron

He wants to clean as he goes but listens to you when you say to wait until the end. Though he gives you some massive side eye.

He gets a bit curious for his own good and you whip around when you hear him retching: "I thought it would be sweet" he explains as he sticks his tongue under the faucet pointing at the imitation vanilla. You can't help but shake your head and laugh.

He is stealing so much raw cookie dough you have to keep a spoon simply to smack his hands with....though he does eventually take it from you and you end up getting a spanking that leads to the bowls overturned on the floor lol

After another store run the cookies are finally in the oven! He for sure burns himself a couple times and you have to kiss his boo boos.

Once the cleaning and cookies are done he grins at you and tells you he has a surprise before disappearing out of the kitchen.

He reappears with giant mugs, plates, a movie and matching onesies! "Lets change then divy up the cookies and see who can eat the most before The Grinch Stole Christmas is over" he exclaims excitedly as you laugh. "Babe, we made like 300 cookies" you say but he simply shrugs.

Go to event page

[telleroftime]

So you know how Peach bakes cakes for Mario and Bowser one hundred percent gets jealous of it?

I'm sure we've talked about this before but that's not gonna stop me. I'm just thinking about baking him one as a gift and seeing the way he instantly lights up. Big doofy smile, visibly standing taller, eyes wide, tail wagging-

He's just so happy because he's special to you.

You find it interesting just how excited he gets and luckily Kamek is kind enough to explain. Though you may not really understand his previous infatuation with Peach you at least pick up on why this made him so happy. So now you bake him things all the time just because you've seen first hand how loved it makes your special guy feel.

And if you aren't good at baking you ask the cook's in the castle kitchens and they help you without question.

Just imagine how to you, the first time you bake him something, it wouldn't be such a big deal.

It was just a cake. It wasn't like it was exceptionally tall or decorated in golden leaves. It was just a simple cake and yet there he is, King Bowser in all his glory, falling into those subconscious quirks or his.

Wagging his tail which either brings up dirt of the ground in a little cloud of dust, or is very audible with the way his scales slide against the floor. Trying as hard as he can to control the wide grin but failing, only causing his lips to twitch higher as he flashes his teeth in the goofiest of expressions.

Oh and just imagine how carefully he'd pick up the cake. How he'd ask you a hundred times if the cake is actually for him. How he'd refuse to eat it at first and he'd simply stare at it in awe because once he does eat it it'd be like it was never there to begin with. Oh and the love he'd absolutely shower you with afterwards.

Just imagine how he'd have a lot of cakes ordered in for you. The best of the best, by the best cooks and bakers his kingdom has to offer. Whatever the price, you'd have it. Bowser would guide you to the room where there's just baked goods towered up high. He'd sit you down at the table and excitedly watch as you plate your favourites.

At that moment all he'd want is to hear you ramble about how your day went up until that point, he'd be content not eating any of the food. He'd just want to sit and watch you with his tail thumping lightly on the floor behind him with a lopsided grin on his snout.

And he'd definitely order them instead of making them himself because I think we mentioned this before how that man should not be allowed in the kitchen. Ever. If I'm not wrong it's a mutual headcanon that Bowser cannot bake.

Oh, and to those like me who cannot bake to save their life - imagine if you can't bake and you refuse to ask the castle's cooks for help.

Like, you managed to maybe bake a cake the first time around, which is how you know Bowser becomes absolutely overjoyed when he receives baked goods, but be it beginner's luck or simply an off-day, you can't recreate it. No matter how many times you try and how hard you follow the recipe's instruction, nothing seems to work.

The batter either doesn't rise or it tastes too much of baking powder. It's either burnt or still practically raw and now you're on your fourth attempt and refusing to let anyone else be in the same part of the kitchens as you because you want to spare yourself the embarrassment.

Forget cleaning as you go too. At this point the actual station would be covered in a variety of ingredients. The flour is ironically caked on all the surfaces around you. There's bits of egg white just clumping with sugar on the worktable. There's crumbs from the past attempts littered everywhere and the frustration is very much starting to boil.

But, since you've made it once, you can do it again. At least that's what you hope though it doesn't seem to be that easy. And nothing seems to be going your way.

It's supposed to be a gift for Bowser, an attempt to see that grin of his again and see how overjoyed he becomes. Like you said, the tail wagging and thumping excitedly on the ground, the extremely goofy grin of his. But now you're there with a frown etched on your face because the batter isn't baking itself.

Just imagine missing dinner over this. The cooks were too worried to try and bother you because you were so focussed. Maybe you didn't hear them the few times they tried to get your attention because the dinner was ready. Either way, Bowser definitely notes your absence at the table and he's maybe eaten around half of his meal before he decides to go an look for you.

Because let's be honest, he'd be anxious if you're not there when you are supposed to be. The way you wrote him in the latest chapter of 'A Missing Gem' was utterly perfect. And yeah, he'd go and search for you.

And it wouldn't take him long to find you either.

From the smell of burnt batter to a bunch of cooks diligently avoiding one of the kitchen's entrances, he'd check if you were there and boom, you are. You are and you are covered in baking ingredients, a painful heat on your face from annoyance that only spreads as the embarrassment hits your. Because Bowser had caught you in your struggles.

And here's the thing, I don't think he'd care much if you can't bake. You had tried and you'd definitely get the exact same reaction you'd get if you actually presented him with a cake. It's the thought that counts and you'd still cause his tail to wag and you'd still get to see that dopey smile. He'd tease you for it if only to see the way you react, but he'd be overjoyed anyways.

Because you tried to bake for him.

Oh boy, if this post is a mess it's because I didn't write it in order and didn't read through it in full. My bad. I'll fix it eventually.

[emmyrosee]

Hello again queen‼️✨ hope that ur doing well!! I had some insane Osamu brainrot because of THIS post I saw on Pinterest

(I know what when no one got me, pintey got me 😔🤚) and immediately my brain was filled with Samu Samu to the point I wrote myself a Drabble about it 🤭🫣 - I FIGURED YOUD LOVE THE DELIRIUM ABOUT OUR MAN AS MUCH AS ME HEHE (I’ve got no one to share it with, alas) ~enjoy dreaming about midnight cooking with Samu in the kitchen while he makes you sit on the counters all pretty, making you the snack you wanted in between teasing and attention ehehehehehhehehe~

Drink lots of water in these trying times‼️ Take care of itself bb‼️💗✨🤍

OSAMU NEEDS A PRETTY GF TO BUG HIM WHILE HE COOKS OKAY???

He needs to be completely bothered I DONT MAKE THE RULES-

Like you’re just sitting there, prettily on the counter, and he wants you to get involved a little (bc he knows you’re gonna start being a little shit, and he’s trying to offset it for now) so he passes you a small mixing bowl with dry ingredients. Then, he gives you the wet ingredients to beat together. All the while, he’s sure to give you little kisses that keep you satisfied while he tries to grind through baking the cookies you asked for to share at god knows what hour of the night.

Facing away from you at the stove, he hears you silently get up from your perch, your feet hitting the ground and echoing in the air. Then, he hears you walk to the fridge, open the freezer, and while he’s not sure what you’re grabbing, he’s just glad you’re occupied.

The sentiment dies quickly however, when your feet pad over to him, cutting bits of a chocolate bar up, and your hands immediately dart to his flanks, making him shriek at the frigid surprise. You giggle, and god if he didn’t love you so much, he’d banish you from the kitchen entirely.

Like that would ever happen.

“Why? Why are you the way you are?” He grumbles, turning to face your cheeky face.

You give him a prideful smirk, “you just looked so handsome all focused. I can’t help that I like your focused attention on me.” Your arms move to wrap lowly around his waist, a clear and affectionate sign that you’re officially ready to bother him.

“You, can share it for twelve minutes,” he teases, giving your nose a little flick that makes you scrunch up slightly and your grip tighten. “Do you want to-“

“Nope,” you interrupt. “Gonna stand right here until you’re ready to take my love and not these hands.”

He offers you a sigh and a playful shake of his head before letting you continue to nuzzle and nip at him, taking in dramatic sniffs of his skin and letting your nails run over the dips of his sides and stomach.

“Pspspsps,” you whisper, and he snickers softly.

“What.”

“Can you hurry up, please?”

He lets his head dangle in playful defeat before turning around and lifting you up and over his shoulder, your shrieks and thrashing causing his brain to vibrate from exhaustion. He plops you back down onto the counter, the playful look in his eyes has you giggling and curling on yourself.

“I’ll hurry up, when you can sit three seconds without my attention.” Like a disapproving parent, he crosses his arms and scowls at you, knowing full well it holds no actual threat.

“Well then it appears we’ve reached an impasse,” you hum cockily, meeting his scowl halfway with a kiss, which he does return.

“Let me finish my cookies that you asked for.”

“Let me slice your skin open so I can crawl inside.”

And that’s exactly how you and Osamu end up: curled on the couch and eating raw cookie dough at one in the morning, sprinkling chocolate chips into your mouths and merely basking in each others company.

“Man, I hate giving in to you,” he grumbles, feeding you a small spoonful of the sticky dough.

You snicker and shake your head, “But you do it so well, though.” You take the bite while he just watches with loving eyes, because even if his mouth tries to deny it, the sight of you so happy just being near him is enough to make his interrupted passion worth it.

“Gonna banish you from the kitchen.”

“Good luck- we both know that counter is going to look empty without me.”

He hates knowing that you’re right.

[killercooksblog]

KillerCook Baking Challenge

Howdy - In celebration of starting this blog, I present a challenge! If you've read the book, you'll know the first chapter was about BROWNIES! AKA the best dessert ever, probably. I'll post it below so if you have no idea what I'm talking about you can catch up and participate!

I love a good brownie, and I think everyone has their own unique way of baking goods that makes the recipe special in its own way! Yes, even box mix, cause I know not everyone is following those instructions all the time. If you're a raw batter eater, you're amongst safe company!

The challenge: I want you to make a pan of brownies with you're own secret ingredient that makes it *chef's kiss.* To participate, you gotta submit a pic of your brownie platter to my submissions or ask box by 3:00 PM EST Saturday, June 8th. Additionally, you need to submit a summary of the flavor and texture of your recipe, without saying the name of your secret ingredient.

For example: in my double mint chocolate brownies chapter, I would summarize it as - a dulcet double layer of cacao richness that's not too cakey and not too moist, that will leave you with a fresh and happy ending.

Or something like that. Get creative! I wanna rate your brownies! I'll be playing along too and for the sake of it, I won't be doing mint chips so I can leave y'all guessing too ;)

With the camera set in place, Killer dusted his apron and straightened his helmet one last time before pressing the ‘Go Live’ button, muttering a quick, "It's show time," under his breath.

“Hello, Killer here,” raising a hand in the air, the quarter sleeve of his dress shirt rolled neatly on his forearm. “Time for another day of relaxing vibes and delicious desserts. Today, I’m making Double Chocolate Mint Brownies. I love a goody, gooey brownie, especially when there’s mini chocolate chips and ganache involved.”

As he spoke the well-rehearsed introduction, Killer wandered around the kitchen pulling out mixing tools and fixing himself a glass of bubble milk tea, congregating on the island countertop. Oven already preheated, eggs and butter on standby and at room temperature. Slurping up a tapioca ball, he paused for a minute while he chewed.

“Mm, ‘scuse me, didn’t expect that one to come up all the way. Tasty. Moving on, you know my number one motto: A clean and sterile working environment is best when dealing with things you intend to eat. And please, enough with the Jason Vorhees jokes, my mask looks nothing like his. I’m trying to make a name for myself as an independent serial killer……of hunger and all your hearts,” he brought his hands together to make a heart shape for the audience.

The ping of a microtransaction being made caught Killer’s attention, leaning close to his phone. Someone had bought and redeemed a highlighted message, and it was one of those moments he wished he hadn’t added that incentive, now being forced to read and answer it live.

“MurderinoSquadAssemble has this to say – ‘a serial killer of hunger and OUR hearts? Seems sus but ok. #redflagbehavior.’ Calm down armchair detective. For the record, I haven’t been caught yet and it won’t be to the likes of you.”

Biting down a chuckle, Killer stepped back to put on plastic gloves, a baking hat, and his favorite apron. It was a faded blue color but what really made it endearing for him, was the print.

That’s Hot

It had a small whisk and measuring spoons sprawled on the bottom, and the capital T had a baker’s hat falling off it. Underneath the text, a stovetop on fire. A gift from Kid on his 25th birthday.

Smiling privately, Killer turned to give the audience his side profile as he tied the apron strings. His dress shirt clung to his muscled arms, threatening to burst if he flexed too hard. His ass looked firm and thick in the dark chino relaxed pants he wore.

Prepping the baking tray, Killer explained the ingredients he was using and his choices for alternatives. He preferred to use ethically sourced chocolate and tapioca flour instead of all-purpose flour. He used vegan butter but liked to brown it first to caramelize a bit before combining it to the batter.

“This flour is what I used to make the tapioca pearls for my milk tea in my 14th video. It’s still up if you want to check it out and give it some love,” he poured the batter into the pans.

Turning around completely, he walked to the oven to place the pan on the middle rack. Killer didn’t need to bend down as much as he did to place the pan inside. He also didn’t need to jut his hips backwards a little to make his butt look bigger on camera, but it was nice hearing the pings echoing in the kitchen as he was gifted with tips and praise. Not that he’d admit that to anyone of course.

Killer turned the volume of his Bluetooth speaker louder, enjoying the lofi channel playlist he chose for the day’s stream. It was hard to find good music these days, not with a DMCA lawsuit one flagged video away.

“You can find where I use the same ingredients for the pre-made mint filling layer in my 20th video, when I made my homemade No-reos.”

Underneath the kitchen island countertop was a small red button that Killer pushed. That was the alarm indicator Kid had installed to notify the redhead that it was time for him stop what he was doing, get dressed, and join the video for the taste test.

Hoping beyond hope that Kid would be wearing the clothes Killer laid out for him, the masked man entertained the audience. Acknowledging the redeemed gifts, answering comments and questions and taking a much needed bathroom break. Letting the ads run a bit longer to milk the revenue, Killer stood at the doorway waiting for Kid to make an appearance. Asshole was running late, unbelievable. HE WANTED to be in the live streams, Killer didn’t ask him to be a part of it.

Shaking his head, he sat down in front of the camera, preparing to be KillerCook once more. The oven had three minutes left on the timer and the smell of chocolate wafted. The stream continuing, he began whisking the ganache to pour over the brownies.

Killer heard Kid walking through the hallway as he whisked. Bursting through the door, shirtless, his golden piercings that littered his nipples, nose bridge and ears shined from the open kitchen windows that showed a beautiful sunny day outside.

Timer going off, Killer fumbled to the back while hissing out, “Put a fucking shirt on! Why do you do this every time?!”

“C’mon Kill, they’re not gonna ban you for male nipples, be real.”

“Not risking it, we’re already on thin ice for using copyright music after 2 warnings. Remember? That’s how you lost Your Job as the video editor. Put on a shirt or I pull the plug.”

Angrily swearing, Kid walked back through the door to find a shirt.

“The last step is pouring the ganache over the mint layer and spreading it evenly for a smooth coating. Then you’ll want to store it in the fridge to let the top layer set. This will take up to an hour or you can keep it in longer until you’re ready to eat.”

Cutting into the pan to prepare a square for Kid, the masked baker placed both the pan and the taste test piece in the fridge. Killer once again entertained the audience for the 5 minutes it took for Kid to come back, in a ruffled black vest that was unbuttoned. Killer pulled out a chair for him and went to retrieve the taste test square, placing it on the table in front of Kid.

Coming into view of the camera with an annoyed pout on his face, Kid shot a sneer at Killer before tightening his jaw and looking directly into the lens.

“Alright, now the reason you’re all really here. To watch me eat shit you can’t have and look hot doing it.”

Standing straight, he stuck out his right arm and flexed, slowly moving it down with deliberate motions that further focused on his bulging muscles instead of the baked good. Bringing it to his face, Kid licked his maroon painted lips before taking a bite with a grin. Letting out an approving grunt.

“How’s it taste?”

“Tastes damn good, brother,” Kid responded, biting into the brownie again.

“Can you uh elaborate some more for the audience?”

“It’s chocolate, tastes like chocolate,” he grunted out in between bites.

Sighing deeply, “Does the texture feel balanced? Is it too dry? Can you even taste the mint I added with the chocolate chips?”

Licking his fingers clean and wiping his mouth with the back of hand, Kid shrugged. “Tastes perfect. Like any good brownie should be, it’s moist,” devilish smirk on his face and he faced the camera.

Feeling Killer’s serious as fuck glare through the mask, “Yeah yeah you can taste the mint. It doesn’t overwhelm the chocolate but it wasn’t overstated either. Like a little nudge wanting acknowledgment.”

“And there you have it, moist and acknowledged. Tune in next time when I make one of my favorite dishes, Spaghetti aglio e olio. It’s simple to prepare and like everything else I make, slays. This has been Faffaffaffa-Food with Killer.”

End Livestream.

Killer lifted his baker’s hat, helmet and took his hairnet off, pulling his hair from the tight wound rubber elastic he’d put it in.

“One of these days you’re going to get me banned, dickwad. Think about that the next time you want to fuck around. All those comments of praise and validation gone just like that,” he snapped his fingers, “Because you can’t stop being a dumb whore for 5 minutes.”

“I’m a whore?! Oh stuff a brownie in yer mouth and calm down. You’re not you when you’re hangry,” Kid snickered, ducking out of the kitchen to avoid the stainless-steel bowls flung at him.

Bonus: The comment section

ICantEven101: Killer-san, why won’t my sauce stick to my noodles? KillerCook: You may be using too much oil or butter. A good trick is to add in pasta water to thicken the sauce. Corn starch is a good binder as well.

VanillyExtract: PunkNeverDied69 can I take you on a date? 🥺 PunkNeverDied69: You can’t afford my tastes.

GimmeDa’Za: Day 15 of asking for a Heat cameo and dutch oven pizzas. FlamingHot420: Why are you people obsessed with me? I walked into the kitchen ONE TIME.